Reflections following some exercises from Kaur's book

This comes from part of the Imagine Your Death exercise. These "Letting go of Anger" exercises are killer. Actually it comes from yesterday, but I want to mention that after working for some abusive employers - abuse of power, obvious mental illness, whatever - we need something like Al Anon for families where it teaches you that it is not your fault your parent was an alcoholic. That's where I'm placing my anger in the 3 instances I'm thinking of - it's not my fault - especially one instance where I was essentially "shunned" by my employer and her assistant, for a good 8 months. Communication through notes, generally making them very ugly in my eyes. Really just the 3 of us in captured in 1's creation. Every day that I drove into work, I prayed for those women's lives to be blessed, and I prayed to be able to forgive them. Luckily, after their hideousnesses, I found myself with the most kind employers you could imagine. Truly a miracle. And even with that, even knowing that the former employer was and is a narcissistic control freak with a real mental illness, I really find it hard to let go of my anger 2 years later. ACIM would say this is my ego feeling elated to be justified in not releasing them to forgiveness. I say that my ego is feeling justified but the rest of me knows I need to forgive and let go. The other 2 instances, I understand that one former employer is just made the way she is, and doesn't care, while the other one made an attempt to patch the damage, real true damage, she had caused me. These last 2 I release. I even have moments where I release the shunner. But then I reel her back in with my thoughts. And I feed her to sharks.