Perspective

I have read a book that I borrowed from the hospice: Making Miracles Happen by Gregory White Smith and Steven Naifeh. Gregory Smith has brain cancer and has been fighting it for ten years. But the point I want to make is this: that reading books written by cancer "people" is a far different experience for me than reading ACIM or Eckhart Tolle. They write things that seem like nothing but hit so hard, like being fascinated by babies or putting things in plain perspective.

"'The hardest pill to swallow...is the realization that from the moment of the accident or illness or operation occurs, your life will never be the same. Everybody assumes that they're going back to the way they were. They're going to be in the same job, they're going to have the same physical capabilities. Their work, their spouse, their family, their friends, everything is always going to be the same. When, in fact, it never will be the same after.'"(MMH, p.224)

This weekend I knew was going to be beautiful, and making the decision to stay home rather than going to the cottage caused me much anguish because will I be there next year? Which books should I take the time to read? etc., etc..
Making decisions is becoming difficult for that "reasoning". Not only life situations change, but I can't help but to think in extremes. While remaining positive. And trying to function normally, greet the neighbours, and make a miracle happen.
The hopice is also starting a group in October, where you take a lunch and talk, but I'm undecided if that is for me. I have heard that it is really a good thing to do and will extend your life, and if anyone has attended such a group for illness, please let me know your opinions on it and if you feel it helped you. I suppose I'm committing to the hospice program of a positive meditation/visualization then touch therapy which connects me with others who may have any illness and who want to be well. They all seem very kind and I can almost feel their wings cover me protectively.
Unfortunately I haven't been using the Tibetan bowl very much, but Mike is fascinated by it and loves to make a deep vibration come from the bowl and try it on different surfaces, even though I've told him he holds the pestle wrong and his quests are impossible; he continues and proves me wrong, thank God, places the bowl on my abdomen, and makes it sing a low vibration which I really do feel work its way through me and heal along the way.
I absolutely love the CD that my hypnotherapist made me because it puts me into a deep deep state of "altered" relaxation and it seems to do it to me every time I listen. I would say that this is one of the best therapies I've pursued, with the right therapist, and I absolutely recommend it.
Serene has stepped on some button which has altered the screen completely so I will post this now.